Let’s face it, the holiday season can be a stressful time of year. While movies depict happy families laughing around the kitchen table or in front of the fireplace, that’s often not the reality we face as moms. At this time of year, we often find ourselves more stressed and busier than ever. I know I fall into the trap and every year I commit to staying focused on what really matters and working on managing holiday stress.
We want the holidays to be filled with warm memories for our family members, but it’s so easy to get caught up (pun intended) in the business of the season. There are often so many things to do that it is difficult to be present with our loved ones. Have you ever felt like you were to lose one’s mind during the holidays ?
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There has to be a better way!
Can we simplify the Holiday season?
Over the years, I have looked for ways to make the holidays special while still providing my children with the traditions and memories that bring joy. Some of the things that have worked for us are prioritize experiences on material gifts, limiting the number of gifts per person and focusing on a spirit of giving rather than receiving.
All this aside, it is difficult to recognize the external forces that act on us despite our best intentions. There are so many things on our to-do lists and there’s a lot of pressure to make the vacation perfect. But I believe we can try to resist some of the stress and pressure that social media and society puts on us.
Reject it Holiday Stress for our Mental Health Well-being
As the holidays approach, we are bombarded with messages that sow panic in us: “There are X days until Christmas!” » From TV commercials to social media to store windows, it’s easy to feel our stress levels rise when we see marketing starting as early as October. All this holiday stress can’t be good for us or our mental health!
This is also not the kind of vacation we want for our families! We don’t want to feel rushed or panicked about buying enough and doing enough. Instead, we all yearn to spend time together with our loved ones, create memories, and spend time together in less stressful situations to face.
So, I say… this year, let’s start Christmas again! This might not be the year you magically transform your vacation into the living embodiment of a Real Simple magazine article. But this can be the year you create enough space for you and your family to shape and enjoy holiday traditions.
Don’t we owe it to our children to manage stressors by creating a safe, stress-free vacation for them so that they remember it as the most wonderful time of the year? And chances are it won’t take much!
Managing holiday stress Through minimalism
Our family has become a big fan of minimalism. This has helped us define what is truly important to us and then makes it easier to remove items that don’t add value. Minimalism works for our schedule too. Since we know our family values, we only say yes to things that align with those values.
One of the main ways to simplify the holidays is to only give one material gift per person. This may seem extreme to some, but over the years I have realized that experiences mean more to my family than material gifts. Not only does this fit our minimalist lifestyle, but it also helps reduce the financial stress that can sometimes set in during the holidays.
Although there are many opportunities for fun and festive events during the holidays, we don’t participate in everything. We can’t attend every holiday or festival, so we choose the most meaningful ones. This lifestyle choice removed some stressors from an already busy season.
7 steps to simplify Holiday season
Since there are a lot of fun activities and things you don’t want to miss, you can’t cancel everything. I have found that creating realistic expectations and setting boundaries is helpful. I use these steps to help me focus on my family rather than everything that needs to be “done.”
1. Rate your favorite traditions
Think back to Christmases past. What are your most precious memories? What have you enjoyed doing and what have you always looked forward to? This could be from your childhood or from times spent with your own children.
Chances are, your best memories aren’t about things but about time spent with loved ones. Maybe it was baking cookies with your family members or creating a DIY tree garland together. Or he could have been driving around looking at the lights while drinking homemade hot chocolate.
Take note of anything that strikes you as a tradition that you would like to recreate. Then share your ideas with your family. Ask them if there is anything they like to do this time of year.
2. Plan the essentials
Make a must-do list using the list of your favorite vacation memories as inspiration. Keep this list short – three to five items maximum. Narrow it down to what really matters most.
These essential traditions will of course change over the years as the family grows. That’s all its beauty. You may be faced with a special situation (a new baby, travel plans, a sick parent or a tight budget). Reevaluate and adjust, limiting yourself to what will bring you the most joy this year.
Prioritize traditions that help you connect with friends and family. Put them on the calendar now. Remember to schedule intentional downtime to help you manage holiday stress. Say yes to those things that bring you joy and no to the rest. Your future self will thank you for giving your schedule a little break!
3. Determine stress triggers
We all have our little habits that rob us of our joy. It could be online shopping in the middle of the night, when we can’t sleep. It could be that urge to rush to the store at 10 p.m. on Christmas Eve to buy more presents. Or it could be eating too much, which makes your digestion slow. Or maybe he stays up late to get everything done.
If we can identify just one or two things that stress us out each year and eliminate them, that seems like a good kind of minimalism. Decide what you’ll say “no” to this year (and tell someone to hold you accountable).
4. Managing Holiday Stress on a Budget
This is pretty generic advice, I know. But I can think back to many years when I didn’t, or at least never committed to anything other than a vague idea of what was “too much.”
Giving gifts brings joy and is a noble tradition. But it’s important to be intentional about what we buy. One rather shocking statistic is that in the United States, only 1% of the goods we buy are still in use six months later. Yes… only 1%! And that makes sense, right? New things only excite us for a little while.
In fact, we are more likely to remember and cherish experiences rather than material things. These are the stories we tell and relive. Establish a budget and be demanding about the types of gifts we give helps us not to be overwhelmed and to appreciate what we have.
5. Designate a “Give Back” Day or Week
Making room for what we receive and focusing more on giving than receiving often hurts children. Mention that you’re about to get rid of something, and suddenly that thing becomes their “favorite.” Am I right?
Designating a “Give Back” day (or even a week if necessary) gives everyone the opportunity to get in the right mindset and know expectations. This item offers helpful tips to help children get on board.
6. Keep track of purchased gifts
It’s so easy to lose track of what we intend to gift and what we’ve already purchased when it’s hidden in the back of the closet! I like to keep a digital record by taking a photo and keeping an album in a secure location (a place my kids can’t access!). Use apps like Evernote or Don’t forget the milk or store it in a Drop box Or Google Keep case. Also be sure to keep track of small items, like Christmas gifts. You can keep a screenshot of any experience gifts you purchase.
Before you buy, take a look at the album and give yourself some time to think about whether it’s the right choice. You can even move images to a new album or folder to keep track of returns or gifts that didn’t make the cut but that you might consider for next year.
7. When things go wrong, do an act of gratitude
Traditions develop little by little, from year to year, and sometimes without prior planning. By learning to let go and let memories happen, we make room for shared experiences with those we love most. Show your gratitude for what you have and give your children and yourself the greatest gift of all: a happy, present parent.
How to keep your feet on the ground during the holidays? What traditions do you want to make room for?
