What I learned from bringing ancient wisdom into a modern existence.
You can sum up Japan in two superlatives.
Super amazing And super unique.
After a friendly couple visited there, they told me about the efficient public transportation, the crazy food, and the women dressed as children selling stuff in front of the stores. It was a unique experience.
But what stands out above all is Japanese culture, between Zen Buddhism and robots serving food.
Intrigued by their stories, I went down the rabbit hole, unearthing many inspiring philosophies that I have since incorporated into my life.
Most of them stand in stark contrast to our modern Western culture, which is probably why I’ve been happier since.
Wabi-sabi, the art of imperfection
Perfectionism equals fear.
When I first started coaching, I created very specific plans and documents for my clients. Preparing for a session was like inventing a fusion reactor and building a particle accelerator at the same time. I wanted to leave nothing to chance.
I thought I did it because I wanted to create as much value as possible for the customer.
But I did it out of fear – fear of not being worthy and not being good enough if I didn’t do a perfect job.
“At its core, perfectionism isn’t really about deeply loving attention to detail. It’s a question of fear. Fear of making a mistake. Fear of disappointing others. Fear of failure. Fear of success. -Michael Law
Today, my sessions are different. Instead of taking away the beauty of imperfection, I cherish it. If a call goes in a different direction than intended, I let it go through. It’s not what we planned, but without exception, it’s where we needed to go – and my client and I are happier for it.
The Japanese concept of Wabi-Sabi it’s about finding beauty in imperfections.
Leave dried flowers as decoration. Aged and discolored woodworking. Repairing cracked pottery and painting the seams with silver or gold, an art called Kintsugi.
What you do doesn’t have to be perfect to be perfect.
When you let your fear disguised as perfectionism take over, you disrupt the flow of life. What if it rains during your evening? Dance in it. What if you ruined the paint on a wall? Get your kids involved in the colors and make it one of a kind. What if you looked into your presentation? Take the opportunity to make a joke and inject a little humanity into a robotic professional life.
True beauty lies in imperfection.
Kaizen, the way to climb even the highest mountains
If you don’t move forward, you stay still. If you stay still, you die.
I swam competitively for eight years. Every year I improved by a few seconds and couldn’t wait to surpass my competitors in the competition. Every year they have also improved.
But over time, we all broke our personal, national and club records again and again.
If someone had told me about this at the start of my swimming career, I would never have believed them.
But little by little, I got there.
Without knowing it, I followed the Japanese art of Kaizen – continuous improvement.
When you have a mountain of work ahead of you, it seems overwhelming. Start a business ? So much to do. Raising children? So much to consider. Renovate the house? So much work.
Don’t get overwhelmed.
You won’t hit a home run the first time – that’s okay. Habit expert James Clear says you only need to improve 1% every day to become 38 (!) times better in a year. 1.01^365 = 37.78
You just need to get started.
The Kaizen philosophy is based on the principle that our way of life – whether it is our professional life, our social life or our family life – deserves to be constantly improved. – Masaaki Imai
Ask yourself what you avoided because it seemed like too much.
Find the first small step you can take.
Then continue and improve, little by little.
That is what matters.
Jiro Ono is the best sushi chef in the world.
At 97, he has been making sushi for more than eight decades and has earned his Tokyo restaurant three Michelin stars. When I watched the documentary Jiro dreams of sushi, I got a glimpse of the insane dedication he puts into his craft.
He pays attention to whether his guests are right-handed or left-handed and places the chopsticks accordingly. For years, he has been refining the ideal time to cook rice, massage octopus and fry eggs. He perfected the presentation, the order of seating, the spiciness of the wasabi, and the correct amount of pressure needed to make the rice base firm yet chewy.
Watching him work is a pleasure in itself because he follows the concept of Kodawari – paying attention to every little detail.
It’s not so much about obsessed on the details, but to honour them.
In your relationship, appreciate the little things and small gestures. When people talk to you, listen to what they say Really saying. Go the extra mile at work – the glass of water I get from my hairdresser makes a huge difference.
“I do the same thing over and over again, getting better little by little. There is always a desire to do more. I’ll keep climbing, trying to reach the top, but no one knows where the top is. – Jiro Ono
Ichigo Ichie, the eye-opening reminder we all need
One day, it was the last day you played with your childhood friends – but you didn’t know it.
I spent one last day building castles in the sandbox before I got too old. One last cuddle while feeling our dog’s coat before the vet has to put him to sleep. One last conversation with my grandfather before he passed away.
But with all that, I didn’t know it was the last time. None of us do. We just keep doing things until eventually we don’t do them anymore.
If we knew it was the last time, we would pay more attention.
But here is the hard and revealing truth.
Everytime you do something, it’s the last time you do it.
People change. Situations change. You change.
This is what Japanese philosophy says Ichigo Ichie reminds us of this.
This is explained by once, a meeting.
“This moment only exists now and will never come again.” – Japanese proverb
The next time you’re trying to solve something quickly, your partner is annoying you, you want your kids to shut up, or for the work to finally be done, don’t distract yourself. Remember that this is the last time you will experience this precise moment.
Cherish him.
Shoshin, the ability to stay excited no matter what
Every time I try something new, I see the same pattern.
At first I’m very excited, I learn a lot, I make great progress, then I run out of steam. Some things I stick with, like writing and lifting, but most I let go of. Even the ones that survive don’t give me the same excitement after a while.
It is not a question of time but of the decision to stay hungry.
Once you understand the ropes, it’s easy to do things the same way over and over again. Evolution cable we can save energy and walking the same path over and over again is convenient.
This is where the Japanese philosophy of Shoshin intervenes.
This means approaching everything with a beginner’s mind – staying curious and willing to learn.
When I applied it, I found my enthusiasm again. I tried new writing formats, lifting routines, and ways of talking to people. I started to learn from my experiences again.
“The pleasure of rediscovering, each time, the true nature of the phenomenon we have experienced is a joy that never wears out. » – Jirô Horikoshi
Where are you stuck in your routine? To be curious. To ask questions. Become a child again.
Life is full of endless wonders.
You just have to keep looking.
Summary to help you live a happier life
Happiness lies in every moment – you just need to approach it in the right way.
Japanese wisdom helps you invite it into your life today.
- Wabi-sabi: Find beauty in imperfection instead of letting your fears lead you to perfectionism.
- Kaizen: improve in small steps instead of getting overwhelmed by a mountain of work.
- Kodawari: Honor the details and be present in what you do instead of half-heartedly doing it.
- Ichigo Ichie: Treat everything you do as the last time you can do it instead of wishing it would end.
- Shoshin: Stay curious, ask questions, experiment, and keep a beginner’s mind instead of getting bored with the same routines.
Let a little ancient wisdom guide your modern life.
